Tamar was a Canaanite woman who’s story is often associated with incest and she usually gets a bad rap for this. Was this really the case, or was she just being brave in taking matters into her own hands? Let’s take another look at what happened.
Tamar was first married to Judah’s older son, Er, who was killed by God for displeasing Him (the Bible does not mention exactly what he did). According to the law of levirate marriage (Duet 25:5–6; Mt. 22:24)¹, the next son, Onan, married her next in order to help her have children for his deceased older brother. Onan did not like this and so he spilled his semen on the ground whenever they had sex. God did not like this either, and killed Onan for it. Judah promised that the next son, Shelah, would marry Tamar when he became of age. He however did not fulfil this promise, and this might have been because he was scared of losing Shelah like his previous 2 sons: “For he thought, “He may die too, just like his brothers” (Gen 38:11).
I have noted in previous articles how a woman’s sense of security, provision and identity almost entirely depended on her husband in those days. So, as a widow, Tamar had no one to fill this role as her sole provider. She was also childless in a society where a woman’s value was greatly influenced by her child-bearing ability. Now, we readers know that it was God who killed Judah’s sons, but Judah might have not known this. He therefore might have thought Tamar as a “lethal woman,” a woman whose sexual partners are all doomed to die³. This might explain why Judah was afraid to give out his youngest son, Shelah.
As a result, Judah wronged Tamar. According to Near Eastern custom, and the laws which governed them at the time, if a man has no son over ten years old, he could perform the levirate obligation himself; if he does not, the woman is declared a “widow,” free to marry again³. If Shelah was underage, Judah could have performed the levirate marriage himself or set Tamar free to remarry. Instead, he sent her to live in her father’s house as a widow-in-waiting until Shelah became of age. She could not remarry and had to stay chaste until she was given Shelah-she was in limbo. Judah understood the workings of this society, so to leave Tamar bound in this way was unkind. Yet, it seemed that he allowed his fear to result in this injustice to her (Gen 38:11).
Tamar waited for Shelah to grow up but she realized, after time passed, that Judah was not going to honor his word and the law. She therefore devised a plan to secure her future by tricking Judah into having sex with her. Interestingly, she did not plan on incest, from what we understand now about levirate marriage expectations, but just plain trickery in getting Judah to do what he should have done in the first place. Yes, a father-in-law may not sleep with his daughter-in-law (Lev 18:15), just as a brother-in-law may not sleep with his sister-in-law (Lev 18:16), but these incest rules are suspended for the purpose of the levirate as the brother/father who performs this role is only considered a surrogate for the dead husband³.
Tamar pretended to be a prostitute in a town where Judah went to visit a friend. Judah had lost his wife, and took this prostitute for comfort. The law of the land then did not condemn a man from doing this. Tamar conceived, and when Judah asked for her to be burnt for playing the harlot, she revealed that the pregnancy was his by presenting his seal, cord and staff (he had given these as a pledge to the prostitute in lieu of payment). Judah admitted his fault and publicly announced Tamar’s innocence, “She is more in the right than I” (Gen 38:26), recognizing her innocence and admitting his wrongdoing in not freeing her to remarry or performing the levirate marriage³. Tamar gave birth to twin sons Perez and Zerah. Through Perez, Judah and Tamar became ancestors of Jesus (Matt 1:3–16).
While Jesus could have chosen a perfect lineage, He chose to know and understand humanity on every level-even through a dysfunctional family line¹. He also had a mixed family line which probably foreshadowed the fact that both Jews and Gentiles (Israelites and non-Israelites) alike are to share in the blessings of the Gospel⁴. Tamar was a forerunner of this Jew-Gentile mix!
Tamar was not considered one of God’s chosen people as she was a non-Israelite. While her actions were unorthodox by modern standards, she ‘redeemed’ Judah, in a way, by saving him from doing what was wrong². I think God channeled her assertiveness into an act of faith that marked her lineage for generations to come in a story that showed that God does not play favorites.
Then Peter began to speak: “I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts from every nation the one who fears him and does what is right. Acts 10:34–35
There will be trouble and distress for every human being who does evil: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile; but glory, honor and peace for everyone who does good: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. For God does not show favoritism. Rom 2:9–11
References
- Bucher, M. (2020, January 21). Who Is Tamar in the Bible and Why Is She Important? Crosswalk.com. Retrieved February 24, 2021, from https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/bible-study/who-is-tamar-in-the-bible.html
- Fletcher, E. (2006). Who Was Tamar? Womeninthebible.net. Retrieved July 19, 2021, from https://www.womeninthebible.net/women-bible-old-new-testaments/tamar-judah/
- Frymer-Kensky, T. (2009, March 20). Tamar: Bible. Jewish Women’s Archive. Retrieved February 24, 2021, from https://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/tamar-bible
- Zondervan. (1988). All The Women of the Bible: Tamar №1. Bible Gateway. Retrieved February 25, 2021, from https://www.biblegateway.com/resources/all-women-bible/Tamar-No-1
